I know it seems silly. It's a detail- a detail that's been true since my baby's conception, a detail that doesn't change my love for my child or the fact that I am now a mother or the path of change that life continues to follow.
But it's a big detail to me. Not because I was hoping for a son, or hoping for a daughter (I really had no preference), but because it is a detail that reminds me that my baby already has a personality, a frame, a set of genes. It's a detail that helps fill in the cracks that the movements, reading, the appointments, and physical changes leave behind.
Maybe I'm a little bit dramatic. I won't deny it.
But last Friday, I found out that I have a son. A perfectly healthy-looking son.
I saw him move. His hands in front of his eyes and behind his head. His knees tucked up to his belly . I was so glad that Tim was there because I couldn't have properly described what it was like to see our son no matter how hard I tried.
It was...it was as if I could see another piece of my world with Tim fall into place. My husband is a father to a son. I don't have the words yet to express what that is doing in my heart. But I can tell you this: similar to the way the love between Tim and I has grown over the last 6 (?) years, this whole becoming-parents thing is deepening it. A man who loves, takes care of, prioritizes, enjoys, and adores (I'm sure I'm missing some fitting verbs here) his wife and kid(s) is a treasure. And? Incredibly sexy.
I'm dreaming of watching my husband in action as a father and as the husband of a woman who is crazy about him. I'm dreaming of getting to know my baby boy. I'm dreaming of the adventures we're going to live out in life.
-Weight of my baby (according to the anatomy scan): 1 lb. 3 oz.
-Food cravings/aversions: nothing in particular (oh, except I want chocolate every.single.day...and I still am not into meat.)
-Crazy dreams: I have them almost every night (really ridiculous stuff), but never seem to remember them for long.
-Weight gain (total since my last appointment): 11 pounds
-Thoughts on who will be the stricter parent: My vote is me. Although I might like to say otherwise, Tim's much more of an adventurer/free-spirit than I am.
-Movement: I can feel my baby move more and more. In fact, while I was reading over this post, I saw my belly visibly move!
If you want to see pictures of my bare pregnant belly, scroll down a bit. (I have no shame.) But fair warning- I am blindingly white..and, well, pregnant.