How to Be Married for 5 Years and Love It

I have been married to my best friend for 5 years today.

I'm not planning on writing a mushy post to go along with my anniversary (but my posts often end up quite different than how I planned them to be, so no promises), but I will say that it's true what you hear about communication being really, really, REALLY important to a quality relationship.

I will also say that a major reason why I think I can say this from experience is Tim.

Communication is not my strong suit.

I mean, yes, I do like to write (ahem, I love to write), but that in-person, super-honest stuff? It's hard. It's awkward sometimes and it requires boldness. (It's scary.)

But over the years, I have learned- through conversation, experience, and observation- how to be more honest. The kind of honest that deepens relationships and sometimes sounds awkward coming out of my mouth; the kind that requires courage (there's that word again!) once in a while.

Let me tell you.

Communication sounds simple,

but it is so not.

Think about it.

We have all these words (and oh, how I love words!), but you know there are times when, even amongst all of them, you can't find the right ones to express what you'd like to say.

You know there are times when you're saying one thing and someone else is hearing another

due to differing perceptions and experiences

with the same words.

It's hard work.

Work which has (mostly) turned in to joy and reward

thanks to the persistence of one man.

I mean it. Many, many thanks to Timothy Koller.

He has made and continues to help me become a better person and is my perfect partner in this adventure called life.

Ok, there's the mush.

(Like I said, no promises.)